If you are just joining me, you’ll want to read yesterday’s hilarious post about how I Freshly Pressed my glasses.  To continue this long and giggle-ridden story, I turn your attention to the very next day.

I have a thing about eyes.  I figure if God meant for ANYthing to touch your eyes, He wouldn’t have invented eyelids!  I’m pretty squeamish about anything touching my eyes including the concentrated airsoft GUN eye doctors use to test glaucoma!  Now before you get on my case about how they need this info, let me explain that I’ve tried to do this twice.  The first time I passed out after the first eye.  The last time it was even before any readings could even be taken.  Over and out!

I always share this before I go in for my eye exams and I have always been able to sign a waiver.  I’m 51 and have worn glasses since I was about 12.  I’ve been through this a time or two and it’s never presented a problem…until now!

After telling me it HAD to be done, the receptionist told me they would allow me to sign a waiver.  After the preliminary exam, off I skipped into the eye doctor’s lair for my exam.  Unfortunately, when I got there, I was met by Dr. StrongArm.  She was less than happy that I had decided to go against her wishes.  She told me I HAD to submit my eyeballs to her airsoft gun because it was A STATE LAW!  When I told her it may be a state law that she could be held legally responsible if I don’t do it and I develop issues later on, it is equally legal to have me sign a waiver absolving her of any legal liability as I am significantly over the age of consent!

Obviously, I was an idiot who didn’t fully understand so she explained it to me as if I were 12.  She said, if I did pass out, she’d call an ambulance.  Oh, REALLY?! And how would that have solved the problem?  She wouldn’t have her readings and I’d be on the hook for an ambulance bill.

So the state would rather I drive with an outdated prescription (or in this case perhaps only one lens) instead of just giving me a prescription without finding out whether or not I might have an eye disease that might perhaps affect my vision later in life?  I told her that I understood perfectly, but I just don’t agree.  In fact, it’s BECAUSE I understand that I don’t agree.  I looked up the statistics and found that glaucoma affects less than 1% of Americans and I don’t have any of the markers.

Her next tactic was to justify my being lied to by the receptionist by saying that if a patient refuses the test, she *convinces them* 100% of the time and there isn’t a problem.  It is, indeed, a rather *persuasive* argument to refuse to continue the exam on a 51 y/o legally blind woman with one good lens who has already inconvenienced her mother to drive her to an out of area location in order to get her new glasses made up within an hour.  But I’m a stubborn old broad.  I told her I just tarnished her record and I walked out.

Check back tomorrow for part three of The Great Eye Glass Case!