So the other day I received this email:

Notice of appearance,

Hereby you are informed that you are due in the court of Houston on the 16 of January, 2014 at 09:00 am for the hearing of your case.

You are kindly asked to prepare and bring the documents relating to the case to Court on the specified date.

Please, download the copy of the court notice attached herewith to read the details.

Note: The case may be heard by the judge in your absence if you do not come.

Yours truly,
Martin Murphy
Clerk to the Court.

Several problems with this pop into my head:

1. How could I receive a notice to appear in a Houston court when I was never, ever IN Houston?

2. How on earth would a court get my email address?

3. Wouldn’t a REAL court appearance be MAILED?

4. Wouldn’t a REAL court give you an actual ADDRESS to appear and a case number?

5. Wouldn’t a REAL court give you more than a few days to appear?

6. “Hereby you are informed“, “You are kindly asked to prepare…“, “Note: The case may be heard by the judge in your absence if you do not COME.” and his title of “Clerk to the Court.” doesn’t sound quite right to me.

7. I didn’t just fall off the turnip truck.  Do they really expect me to click on an attachment to find out what an unnamed court accused me of doing in a town where I never was?