My dh and I endeavored to give our 14 year old son a cultural night out.  It turned into a rather hilarious sort of Keystone Cops expedition.  We went to the symphony to hear Beethoven and a few other odd deceased individuals of musical fame in downtown Phoenix.

We were in the same venue a while back for another concert, but were sitting on the other side of the theater.  On this side, however, the seats were quite a bit smaller.  Either that or we, and all the other patrons, had grown wider since our last visit.  I ended up shoulder to shoulder with my dh on my left and thigh to thigh with a complete stranger on my right who had an affinity for humming.  Unfortunately, he wasn’t humming the same tune as the symphony.  There were a few times during the evening when I had the overwhelming urge to shout, “SHHHHHHH!”

In case you weren’t aware, I’m only 5′ tall with a very short torso.  Sitting down I’m more like a young child.  I’m used to not being able to see over normal sized people, but this night the lady in front of me was sporting a boufont hairdo that would make a 1960s teenager proud.  I never could get a glimpse of the featured pianist.

Trying to make room for my male friend on my right (and so I didn’t feel really, REALLY odd about our rather sudden intimacy of personal space), I crossed my legs to give him a bit more room.  Another reason for this was the fact that my feet didn’t touch the floor and they were dangling and swaying hopelessly from side to side.  I tried to support my top leg with my bottom leg by digging my heel into the part of the floor that had the highest elevation.  After the two hour concert, leg muscles I never knew I had were sore.

The music was beautiful and the musicians were incredible so we did enjoy our time at the symphony despite the rather odd accommodations.  But the night of humor wasn’t over yet.  During the drive home, what did my dh have playing on the radio?  What else?  Metallica!  Which, according to most classical music lovers, just might be considered a sin.