JoJoisms

Silver Linings

Written By: JoJoisms - Jul• 06•15

VIsual JoJoism213I’m starting a new writing category here on JoJoisms because I find that “Laughing through the Struggles” and “Inspiration” are not enough to find your joy.  We also need to find our “Silver Linings” or the little blessings hidden inside our struggles.  And there are some!

I’m going to share a few of mine and I’d like you to share some of your own with me and my readers by posting a comment at the bottom of this post.

1. Being able to bless and support others!

This is the BIGGEST blessing to me.  I love hearing how my story, my writing, my posts, my struggles have inspired and supported others going through similar issues.  It makes me feel like, even the parts of my story that don’t have a silver lining, do have one for others.  And that, in turn, inspires me back.  If even the dark parts of your struggle aren’t somehow infused in some small part with a blessing you can point to, you can take joy in making someone else feel they are not alone, someone else cares.

2. I’m in love with my shower!

We’re not getting married or anything, but taking a hot shower has never felt sooooo good to me before.  I used to jump into the shower with only one thought in mind: get clean and get out!  But now I truly appreciate the power of a good, loooong, hot shower.  Here’s why:

* It eases my pain

* It doesn’t judge me when parts of me jiggle or laugh when I look awkward trying to reach certain parts of my body with achy, tense or painful muscles and joints. 

* It doesn’t ask me why I’m crying  

3. Having Hashi’s flare ups can keep Peri Menopause at bay!

For the first time in YEARS, I was able to blow dry my hair for an hour without having a single hot flash!  I can’t remember the last time I could say that with a straight face! While it doesn’t feel great to be freezing all the time, it did bring a smile to my face to realize that hot flashes aren’t as severe, frequent or destructive.  Know what it’s like to step out of the shower and two minutes later need to step back in?  How frustrating is it to be dripping sweat right after getting out of the shower and getting dressed for the day?

So you see?  You can find little silver linings hidden inside of some of the struggles you go through with chronic illness if you look hard enough.  What are yours?  Please share them here as a comment below.  Maybe one of us can hold onto that one too as we all navigate through this process.  Thank you!

God only allows our struggles to go so far

Written By: JoJoisms - Jun• 29•15

Egg faceSo the other day I was reading Psalm 91, “He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day,” -Psalm 91:4-5 

I began thinking of all the struggles and trials of the last 18 months.  How many times I’ve prayed to God for deliverance.  How many times I’ve cried out to Him in weakness, weary from all the  pain and fatigue, financial burdens and frustrating business tasks which overwhelm me.  I remember one day making eggs and bursting into tears because they made a sad face and I just went into overwhelm.

I didn’t believe God had forgotten me or that He had caused it all. I knew He was with me and was comforting me. “A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, Psalm 91:7a  I thought back to the morning I woke up and felt someone holding my right hand, but nobody was there and how I knew it was God.  Then I came to Psalm 91:7b-8.  but it will not come near you.”You will only observe with your eyes and see the punishment of the wicked.”  (emphasis mine)

I read it over and over.  It suddenly hit me.  The night before, there was another incredible Midwest storm.  We received upteen iPhone warnings of all types: tornado watch, high wind advisory, flash flood advisory, severe thunderstorm warnings.  They bombarded our phones and our ears and our TV too.  We watched and waited in fear as we readied ourselves to escape to the basement stairway to seek shelter.  But we discovered that this storm veered to the south of us and we missed almost ALL of its effects.  We had NO rain, almost no thunder, and NO tornadoes.  All we experienced was an incredible light show, a severe lightning storm that raged outside our windows as we were protected inside our home until morning.  That morning was BEAUTIFUL!  The sun was shining with virtually no clouds (a rarity here in the Midwest).  There was no rain; the humidity was lower and it was a perfect 78 or 81 degrees.  After working hard and reaching various business goals the last three months, we decided to go out and spend family time out in the beauty that God had created and saw fit to show us.

After reading that portion of Psalm 91, I realized that throughout the last 18 months, while hardships and struggles have been thrown at me of all shapes, sizes and colors, none of them had been allowed to penetrate beyond a certain point.

* We rolled over in a car accident where I broke my hand and my dh his back, but we didn’t DIE!

* We lost 30 electronic items to a lightning strike, but we HAD the money to replace them all!

* I had to have my gallbladder out, but I HAD insurance just in time (just prior and we lost it just after) to cover most of the cost!

* My dh had lost his job, but we were LED to businesses that kept us able to pay bills and keep investing in our businesses!

Every struggle was allowed to go only so far and no further and every trial was met with an opportunity.  And even though I had pain and fatigue, I was able to work through it to do the things I needed to do.  God only allows our struggles to go so far.  Often it’s further than we are comfortable with, but we’d have to admit we are still here…still alive…still able to share with others.

“If you say, ‘The Lord is my refuge,’ and you make the Most High your dwelling, no harm will overtake you, no disaster will come near your tent.For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone. You will tread on the lion and the cobra; you will trample the great lion and the serpent. ‘Because he loves me,’ says the Lord, ‘I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call on me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.’  Psalm 91:9-16

Isn’t it amazing how God speaks to you through His Word?  How He comforts you in dreams and with His love which shines through as you reflect on His actions?   And isn’t it amazing how we often don’t even see it until He reveals it to us at a time when we need that insight the most? And how inside of such trials often come amazing blessings or opportunities?  Look again at those sad eggs.  They made a wonderful breakfast for my family that day.  All I had to do was scramble them. 

One of the other scriptures that was in  my devotional reading that day was James 1:12, “Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.”

I’m not saying it’s easy to persevere when everything is coming at you all at once or that I didn’t have times when I broke down in tears (it usually happens several times a day!), but I am saying that He makes us some promises if we trust in Him.  He gives us assurances, if we accept Him.  And maybe someday I can get my body and my mind to a place where I trust Him enough not to fear and to recognize His love during the struggle!

“Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.” -Psalm 91:1

What say you?  Have a story to share about how God only allows our struggles to go so far?  Please comment below. I’m sure it will bless my readers!  Thank you!!

Life’s been an adventure, but I’d like to get off the roller coaster now!

Written By: JoJoisms - Jun• 22•15

roller coasterI remember watching a movie (don’t ask me which one, my fibro fogged brain can’t remember what I had for lunch) in which a man asked a woman to marry him saying, “Marry me and life will never be boring.”  Well, my life has never been boring.  In fact, it’s been quite an eventful adventure.

Even before I was married, my life wasn’t the usual.  Last week on my Art of Eloquence blog, I told my readers about how I lived in several states almost from birth.  Because of that, I’d gone to two elementary schools, two junior highs and two high schools.  I’m only 5′ tall and my head, hands and feet are children’s sized.  Also for the last several years, I’ve worn only purple.  I’m a bit of an oddity from way back!

I began my chronic illness journey probably when I was a teenager and it’s been a difficult road since then.  However, the past 18+ months have been exceptionally difficult beginning with The Year of Faith that Always Never Was.   Most stressful of all has been the last four months or so since my husband lost his job.  In that time, we’ve struggled to find him a job, to make a living working three businesses and to contend with my illnesses without benefit of health insurance.

So life certainly has been an adventure, but I’d like to get off the roller coaster now!  It’d be nice to experience a little boring once in a while.  The mundane can be so comforting.  After all, you know what to expect. You know where you’ll be living and that you can continue to purchase extravagancies such as FOOD!  LOL

Due to severe pain and fatigue, stress and overwhelm, my dd’s wedding, my son’s 16th birthday, and the fluctuating hormones of MENOPAUSE, my emotions have taken a turn and entered the flood zone.  Someone on Facebook asked last week what everyone did for stress relief that worked the best.  Some said a hobby or listening to music.  I thought about it.  I do take natural tranquilizers. They do calm me  at least somewhat. Listening to praise and worship music does soothe me.  Reading devotionals on hard times and reading the Bible does help.  Taking long, hot showers relieves the stress in my body, but I’d have to say that crying is the one thing that really relieves stress.  Unfortunately, I’ve had to engage in it several times a day…or should I say, it has taken me over several times a day.  I never thought about it as stress relief before, but I do feel so much less stressful after crying.  So much so that if I were an actress, I might want to cry on demand.  Sometimes I feel like crying but I don’t/can’t.  Anyone feel that way?  Or is it just weird me?

I can’t say there haven’t been ups as well as downs.  My dd got married a few weeks ago.  It was beautiful and so was she!  My son just turned 16 and he’s a treasure too.  We live in a very nice home and we’ve had some business success through all the frustrations and stress.  God has seen to it that, at least so far, we have had the money when we needed it.  Case in point: after not having health insurance for years, we got it just in time to pay for most of my gallbladder surgery.  Not too long after that, we lost it along with my dh’s job.  Our hills and valleys are sometimes quite manic.

Bottom line, life’s been an adventure these past 52 years, but I’d really like to get off the roller coaster now and find some normalcy.  It would be nice to have a day devoid of tears and fears.  I’m ready, Lord, if You’re willing.  “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight” –Proverbs 3:5-6

How about you?

Chronic illness dictionary

Written By: JoJoisms - Jun• 15•15

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAMany’s the time I’ve tried to explain how I feel to friends or family only to be met with “I felt the same way” and maybe they did one day, yesterday or last week.  What they often miss is the extent to which I feel this way or the length of time I have felt this way.  I’m not just tired because I didn’t sleep well last night or I did a lot of running around today. I’m exhausted…most of the time…often brought on by walking around for an hour at the grocery store.   I’m not sore today.  I’m in pain EVERY day.

So I thought I’d put together a short chronic illness dictionary. I find that not having people understand how I feel is worse than feeling awful every day.  Please share this with loved ones who may not “get it.” 

Chronic Illness Dictionary:

Tired: how a normal person feels at the end of a long day-made better by a good night’s sleep or resting for an hour or so.

Chronic fatigue: (complete mental and/or physical exhaustion) how someone with chronic illness feels upon waking up in the morning, after taking a shower, after a stressful situation, while performing even slightly physical activities or just because-made better by a day or two of total rest or not at all.

Pain: how a normal person feels when they pull a muscle, get a bruise, excercise too much, or break a bone-made better in time after healing the injury.

Chronic Pain: wide spread and sometimes traveling pain that isn’t abaited by meds and NEVER ends.

Sad: how a normal person feels or responds to a bad event in their lives.

Sorrow: profound feeling of sadness that doesn’t go away after the event is over because the event is never over.

Guilt: what a normal person feels when they do something that offends someone.

Profoundly Guilt Ridden: what a chronic illness sufferer feels because they cannot do the things they feel they should do for others or because they need constant help or because they often have to ask for forgiveness for missing life events important for others.

Have any you’d like to add?  Post them as a comment here below.

 

The Great Pantyhose Crisis of 2015

Written By: JoJoisms - Jun• 08•15

The past few weeks have been a whirl wind of activity. My dd graduated from grad school and came home to say with us for a couple of weeks to finish preparations for her wedding. While attending to that, we were also running three businesses and my dh was simultaneously looking for work. All the while, my pain level increased as did my fatigue.

We had wished we could have spent more time with the family doing fun things. We had planned it that way, but the job loss took that away from us. However, despite the overwhelming stress and time of building our businesses and the loss of the financial ability to take day trips or buy our bride-to-be some special gifts, we did find a few ways to enjoy some family time along the way.  Here now are the details entitled, Massages and Dinners and Weddings, Oh My!

One night, when we were swamped trying to complete some deadlines, the kids made dinner for us!

Kids cookin dinner

One afternoon, we took a field trip to a candy factory!  I got some chocolate I’d been craving for weeks!

Candy Factory

Here are we (my dd and I) after massaging away wedding and life stress! Mother/daughter time!

Kelsey and Me

Last weekend was her wedding. I’ll share more about that at a later date, but we had some funny stories about our last week leading up to our trip out to Pittsburg to attend the wedding while all of this chaos was going on around us.  Enjoy the giggles:

The Great Pantyhose Crisis of 2015

As a 5′ NUTHIN’ woman with children’s size 3 feet and who wears children’s sized hats and gloves, I usually have a tough time finding clothes.  My waist is very small, but after having two kidlings, my hips aren’t and I wasn’t well endowed by my Creator so things usually just don’t fit.  However, I was able to find an affordable dress right away that did fit.  I had to go to several stores, but…I found it on the first day out with my dd when she was visiting.  However, the shoes and pantyhose were another story entirely.

They don’t sell children’s shoes that are suitable for a wedding.  So I purchased a size 5.5 on Amazon and prayed they’d fit.  They didn’t, but they were close so I put inserts in to keep my feet from slipping out when I walked.  I felt it would be rather funny to have my shoes fling off down the aisle, but apparently that’s not appropriate.  I thought that was the end of my wedding attire search, but I was sadly mistaken.

So pantyhose aren’t en vogue anymore and most stores don’t really sell them now.  Some did have them, but their smalls went up to 5’7″ and 145lbs!  They did, indeed, have petite sizes, but they were also QUEEN sized.  I’m more little princess sized so that didn’t work.  So I went to my backup plan.  They make children’s tights that look like nylons.  An XL goes up to 110lbs and 5’2″!  Perfect!  Well, not, because they didn’t have any XL.  However, after going to every department store and specialty store this side of Chicago, my dh found a support hose that goes up to 5’5″.  They started off a LOT shorter so they didn’t stretch as much as the others do.  Sooo…yay!  I didn’t have white legs with blue veins at my dd’s wedding!

One Fish, Two Fish, This isn’t my shoe, ISH!

Meanwhile, back at the boys end of things, my dh found a great pair of shoes (for his Father-of-the-Bride suit) which were on sale for something like 85% off!  Got them home and realized that they are both two different sizes!  You don’t really notice it so, unless he puts his feet up, mums the word!

I now return you to your regularly scheduled blog posts coming up next week…

I’ll trust you, Lord.

Written By: JoJoisms - Jun• 01•15

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAAs many of my readers know, the past 18 months have been very difficult for my family and me.  We’ve dealt with catastrophic hardships like a car accident in which we flipped over; natural disasters such as the lightning strike, a flash flood, and a small house fire; health issues like gallbladder surgery which is aside from my chronic illnesses; a job loss resulting in no steady income for three months; and the stress that results such as running three businesses while planning your dd’s wedding and finding a new home after our lease is up.

The stress built up to a level that was almost unbearable. However, working through it has taught me some things for which I am grateful.  I’ll share more about that another time, but one insight led me to write this blog post and I pray it helps my readers who may be struggling with even more than I have had to contend with.

I’ll Trust You, Lord!

Though I don’t feel you near…I’ll trust you, Lord.

Though I don’t see how I get out of this…I’ll trust you, Lord.

Though I still cry…I’ll trust you, Lord.

Though I can’t feel joy…I’ll trust you, Lord.

And though I don’t know when it will end…I’ll trust you, Lord!

How?  How could I trust that which I don’t know, can’t see, can’t feel and see no end to?  Because I trust my Father in heaven.  Why?  Because through all of the trials and struggles, hardships, frustrations and pain, I am beginning to understand more of who God is and because we have a history together in which He has performed incredible feats!

As a Christian, I know that there is nothing that happens to me that God does not allow. The Bible tells me this and that He loves me so much that He sent His son to die for me.  Since He loves me beyond what I can comprehend, there must be a higher purpose.  I knew that, but I didn’t truly understand it until…

I’ve been listening to a lot of Charles Stanley videos on hardship, grief and struggle. Gaining insight. Here’s the one I watched this morning which prompted me to write this post:  http://www.intouch.org/watch/life-principles-to-live-by/adversity-burden-or-bridge-video2   (I’m afraid this non techie, HTML Illiterate can’t find a way to embed this video, but do click on it if you are feeling low. I promise it will be worth your time to watch it!)

As I watched, I had a revelation about Paul and why his struggle (thorn in his side) may not have been taken away from him. He was in very high standing, keeping the law and could have been proud of what he accomplished–even for God. Maybe that’s why he was not healed: to keep him humble and focused on God and the work He had for him.

God allows different trials for each of us according to what we need and to accomplish our own purpose in God. As many of my struggles have lasted a VERY long time, I began to think as if none of them would ever be taken away from me.  But I realized that not all people will be left with their affliction for their entire lifetime. Maybe I won’t either. And, even if I will have to deal with some or all of them for the rest of my life, He has a higher purpose to strengthen and prepare me for my ministry. Maybe that is to be encouragement for others with whose affliction I am well familiar.

Knowing that changed my outlook and I started to see the light in the midst of my darkness.  If that is my mission, I am ready to accept the consequences to serve others and God.

Chronic Illness Rules

Written By: JoJoisms - May• 25•15

Random Acts of Nine-nessEverything has rules. School, work, even science has rules.  There are laws of physics at work on earth every day.  There are also rules for those of us who have to deal with chronic illness.  And as is the usual case, there are penalties for not following the rules.  Unfortunately, the waters are muddied by cross relationships that result in random frustration which I have illustrated here with some amount of humor.  So here are the Chronic Illness Rules…

The Rules of Chronic Illness:

1. You have the right to a burst of energy.  Any energy you feel may be held against you in the court of extreme fatigue.

2. Some meds must be taken with food.  Some meds must be taken on an empty stomach.  It is inevitable that the window for said medication is extremely narrow so plan your meals accordingly.

3. No matter how much money you make and/or how much insurance you have, you WILL be paying out of pocket for treatment…if you want to feel better.

4. No matter how many times you explain it or how effectively you communicate, there will always be friends and family who just don’t understand.

5. Just because you take one pill or cut out one food or have one treatment and it works once, doesn’t mean it will work forever.  Your body changes over time and you will need to reinvent the wheel eventually.

6. Stress makes all treatment virtually null and void.

7. Avoiding stress is impossible when you have a chronic illness that depletes the chemicals and vitamins and minerals that allow you to cope well with stress.

8. Avoiding stress can be very stressful.

9. Everything you are not supposed to eat will be the ONLY things you feel you can tolerate when you really don’t want to eat.

10. There will be times when all you want to do is eat.  Don’t.

11. There will be times when nothing anyone says or does will make you want to eat.  Do.

12. There will be times when you will both want to eat and not want to eat at the same time.  (I got nuthin’)

13.  Getting up too fast will make you dizzy.

14. Not eating will make you dizzy.

15. Trying to figure out if you took these pills already will make you dizzy.

16. Wandering into a room for the fourth time and not remembering why is normal.

17. Hearing the crackling of the fire that is NOT in the fireplace means you left dinner on the stove over an hour ago.

18. No matter how hard you try to pretend you are ok, there will come a time when you will need to talk to someone.

19. Talking to someone about what you are going through won’t help because you picked someone who just doesn’t understand so they told you to pray harder, choose joy and exercise.

20. Talking to someone you thought would understand won’t help because you picked a time when they are going through a tough time too.

21. Keeping everything to yourself sounded pretty good anyway.

22. Not talking to anyone about how you feel makes you cry.

23. Talking to someone about how you feel makes you cry.

24. Watching toilet paper commercials makes you cry.

25. After crying so often, you will finally get some sleep and wake up with a burst of energy.  (See rule number 1)

Did I miss any?  I’m sure I did.  Please share!

What I can and can’t do thru chronic issues

Written By: JoJoisms - May• 18•15

afraidOkay, so during my “Woe is Me” phase of dealing with the stress of my chronic issues (my husband’s job loss, my chronic illnesses and running a few businesses to try to bring an income into the household), I found my way out of my crying funk and was able to push forward a bit.  I still do find myself crying, frustrated and overwhelmed at my chaotic and uncertain situation at times.  However, listening to In Touch Ministries’ (Charles Stanley) videos online has really helped to clarify things, see things more as God sees them, and to begin to move on.

After feeling a bit better, I heard Tenth Avenue North’s song, By Your Side on Pandora.  Part of the song lyrics say, “Please don’t fight these hands that are holding you.”  Something clicked for me.  That’s what I was doing.  I was fighting what was happening.  Instead of using the situation to profit me in some way, I was focusing on what I didn’t want and fighting it.  When I began to get quiet and ask God what He wanted me to do from here, I heard more clearly things that gave me hope.

It suddenly occurred to me that, despite the fact that there are many limitations to my situation, there ARE some things I CAN do.  Realizing these things has given me hope. I pray it does for you as well.  Here goes…

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1. I can only do so much to find my dh a job, but I can be open to different ideas to making money.

2. I can’t stop my illness and pain, but I can choose to go on.

3. I can’t stop trials from knocking me down, but I can choose to get back up.

4. I can’t make God answer my prayer the way I want, but I can choose to ask him to strengthen me through it.

5. I can’t always smile, but I can choose to cry it out and allow myself to be uplifted by friends and fellow faithful Christians.

6. I can’t stop stress, but I can stop fighting God.

Dr. Charles Stanley once said (one of the videos I watched on the In Touch Ministries site) that just as a father might need to hold his son down to allow a doctor to heal him, God sometimes holds you to keep you from harm or to allow something good to happen.

Once I stopped fighting against the perceived bad things that have happened to me, I began to look around at what I could learn from them: what I could profit from having gone through them, what I could become as a result of having the strength to keep going, and what I could give to others from the experience.  That made all the difference for me.

I know now that I can’t fight what has happened in my life, but I can choose to be open to new opportunities. I can choose to go on, to get back up, to allow God to strengthen me, to allow myself to be uplifted. I can choose to feel more empowered and that will lead to less anxiety.

God held my hand

Written By: JoJoisms - May• 11•15

handI told you all I’d update you on my progress and, well, I gave it the old college try, but I just couldn’t choose joy with the tools that devotional talked about…the one I told you about last week. I found myself crying more and being frustrated more and my struggles increased.

So last Wednesday, I couldn’t sleep. Woke up several times. Starting/running three businesses while trying to earn a steady income a month before your daughters wedding and two months after your dh lost his job is even more stressful than I had imagined. I cried out to God for direction and peace for about an hour and then…

The last time I awoke, I really didn’t think I had been asleep. I felt someone holding my hand, but nobody was there.  Somehow I felt it was God.

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I turned to my iPad to read the Bible, devotionals and to pray. Then I found myself watching a few In Touch Ministries YouTube videos on grief, struggles and sadness and then I found one on courage.

I never thought about meditating on the word of God the way he suggests, asking Him questions about how He would do this or how I should follow A or B. I also loved his suggestion not to read through the Bible in a year when you are struggling, but rather to read Psalms or Proverbs. My daughter had told me as much not a few days prior. Finally, I loved his five point plan for finding courage during dark times.

1. Meditate on God’s Word as your compass

2. Recall past experiences when God helped you through challenges

3. Observe the courage of others and their blessings to give you hope

4. Ask the question “What if I do or don’t do this?”

5. Recall His promise that He will never leave me , forsake me and will always be with me

After a few days, I was scrolling around on the internet and decided to type in “God held my hand” and found this: “For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear;  I will help you.” -Isaiah 41:13

I was dumbfounded as I reflected upon my initial thought as I woke up feeling as if someone was holding my hand. Despite the fact that my left hand was hanging free off the couch and my right hand was pinned between my body and the couch back, it was my right hand that I felt someone was holding!

Devotional tells how to…Just Choose Joy

Written By: JoJoisms - May• 04•15

As I talked about last week, I am going through a 21 day devotional on depression in which I found some interesting tidbits.  As promised, I will share what she suggests and how it is working for me.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERASome of the things she suggests to do are things I’ve done in the past, but to be honest in my frazzled and overwhelmed state, I just didn’t do them very often.  I felt I didn’t have time to do them.  As real estate investors, we are busy 24/7 trying to find and flip properties.  People call at all hours and we may need to run out to see a property or get a cashier’s check or do some calculations.  Sometimes I just didn’t remember to do them.  My brain is so fogged, I almost forget who I am!  And, frankly, I didn’t want to do some of them and I’ll explain why in a minute.

Here are some of the things she suggests:

1. Keep a prayer journal to pray for others–take your mind off yourself

Now this I could do. I just didn’t, but I made a point to pray for my readers, my Facebook friends, my family, my children and anyone I happened to see on the news or on the street who I felt could use prayer.  This was easy to do once I resolved to make time and it made me feel useful and took my eyes off my own issues for a while.  Feels good to do for others rather than spending all my waking hours trying to make in income and fix stupid stuff that goes awry.

2. Speak thankfulness over three things each day

This was pretty easy for me as well.  I am, and always have been, thankful for many things in my life that God has given me: my children, my dh, my family…but even things like green grass we didn’t have to water (it rains a lot here in NW Indiana) and birds chirping outside my window.  Though I have pain, I am thankful it isn’t as bad as some I know who have fibro.  Though I have fatigue, I am thankful I CAN do things I need to do.  I’m thankful for friends who check up on me and pray for me.  And I’m thankful for the opportunities God provides that can bring us an income to feed our family.

3. Listen to something funny or watch a funny show

This was not met with any resistance in my home!  We all love humor and a prescription for humor is most welcome.  It doesn’t solve any of our immediate problems, but it does help to ease the stress!  We take the time at the end of the day to watch a funny sit com or movie.  We enlist the aid of sarcasm when appropriate…or anytime we can muster a joke!  Feels soo good to laugh after having such struggles, stress and strain to deal with every day for two months since my dh lost his job.

4. Smile

Now this one was harder.  The devotional said to smile when you don’t feel like it.  Well, that I have to tell you, didn’t feel very natural.  Anyone remember the I Love Lucy episode where they made a movie and Ethel says to Lucy, “Smile when you say that!” and Lucy puts on a forced smile and says, “I’m accusin’ you a cheaten!”  Well, that’s pretty much how I felt doing it.  But the more I watched funny shows and engaged in humor as I discussed homeschooling or business, the more naturally it came.

5. Listen to praise music for at least 10-15min per day

THIS one was the hardest one for me!  I actually waited a long time into the 21 day devotional to begin doing this.  Why?  It made me cry.  I was crying all the time before…several times a day…out of frustration or overwhelm or sadness or loss or hormones or because the toilet paper commercials are just soooooo sad!  Listening to praise music just makes me cry and I felt like if I started to cry, I just might not be able to stop.  But, you know what I found?  Crying helped.  Sometimes I had to cry 7 or 10 times a day.  I cried in the shower. I cried as I was making dinner. I cried while making the bed.  Everything set me off.  And then there were those darned toilet paper commercials!  ROFL  Only kidding, but tv commercials did set me off sometimes.  Odd things would make me cry. Things I never would have expected.  I cried and cried.  Then I picked myself up, wiped off what was left of my mascara and moved on.

I still cry during the day.  I don’t always know why. Sometimes I am frustrated or overwhelmed.  Sometimes I’m stressed.  And sometimes I just cry.  My life is complicated, chaotic and a lot of it is up in the air.  Doesn’t feel very secure.  I don’t often feel God’s peace, but I am learning to choose joy and I can see it from where I am.  I see it through my chronic illnesses. I see it through the loss of a steady income.  I can see it through the struggles of a real estate investment business.  I can see it through all the things that will have to change in the next two months.  But I can see it.  I hope you can too.

I shared a meme on my Facebook wall the other day that said, “Every day is a new beginning.  Take a deep breath and start again.”  I can’t remember where I found it or who the author is, but he is right.  A new day holds many possibilities–even for someone with multiple chronic illnesses who is struggling to overcome a job loss, who has a dd getting married and whose lease is up a month later.  It’s not easy to choose joy.  It takes determination and patience but, the author of this devotional says it can be done.  I can have joy, if I work at it.  I think I’ll try.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace1 as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” -Romans 15:13